The fish story

I can't remember if I told this story here before, so here it is (again).

So there I was, West Berlin, January/February 1991. The Gulf War is on, and we’re out patrolling the site in 40 below (true reading, not wind chill) weather. Monday morning shift change comes along, and we have to inspect all the cars coming in. “Step out, open the hood and the trunk.” Inspect with mirrors and flashlights.

This one car comes up, and on the engine block I find… a fish. A rather large, whole fish. Just lying there, looking slightly surprised, as fish often do.

“Excuse me, sir. Is this your fish?” No.

“Have you ever seen this fish before?” No?

“Do you have any idea where this fish came from?” No!

So we called EOD (explosive ordnance disposal), and they came and blew up the fish.

Turns out, the guy’s buddy had gone fishing over the weekend. Having caught too many fish for their freezer, he thought it would be a hoot to put one on this guy’s engine block, so it would stink on his way to work. Except, at 40 below, the fish never thawed out.